It’s up to me

In our lives we hear so many voices. Do this, do that, I’ve done this, I am going to do that. It’s non-stop.

I had a very enjoyable weekend at an 80th birthday party. I met people I had not seen for decades and many people who I see a lot more frequently. In the past months I have experienced amazing kindness, and this weekend was no exception. So many considerate words, so many ideas. Then everyone leaves and, quite rightly, goes about their lives. Of course they still think of the people they care about, but they move onto the next thing.

I remain with the physical condition, and these are the times when the courage is needed. It doesn’t help to wish I was like the people now going about their lives. Instead I get the shoes on and go out. Today this involved me taking our Subaru into central London for an appointment.

We all have the moments when, after all the advice and the preparation, it’s up to us. It might be a work presentation, a golf shot, a handhold on a climb or facing a difficult discussion. I enjoy the silence before I present to a group of people, and think it’s all up to me.

Andrew Knowlman

I am a 50-year old father of two children, married to Jane. I live in Hertfordshire, UK. I was diagnosed with Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis in April 2015.

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